By Ben McCullough | For On Mission
Do you believe that life has purpose or meaning? If so, how is that purpose determined? Most people sense that life is meaningful, even if articulating that purpose is difficult. How, then, do we discern it? Two answers point in very different directions. One view is that our purpose is given to us, to be discovered over the course of our lives. The other is that we create our own purpose and meaning.
Catholic teaching, however, offers a synthesis: God gives us life, our nature, and our desires — our joys, our suffering, our longings — all to draw us closer to him. Yet he also calls us to engage with those desires, to nurture, guide, and subject them to reason for our own growth. It is within this framework that our faith understands homosexuality.
Desires and passions, in themselves, are morally neutral. Feelings are not chosen; we are passive recipients of them (from the Latin passio, meaning “to suffer or undergo”). Morality comes in how we respond. For example, anger at an injustice is not sinful until we choose to act on it in harmful ways.
The Catechism of the Catholic Church (CCC) defines homosexuality as “relations between men or between women who experience an exclusive or predominant sexual attraction toward persons of the same sex” (CCC 2357). This definition addresses a passion: individuals do not choose to experience same-sex attraction (CCC 2358). Morally, attraction itself is neutral, but, like all desires, it must be brought under reason. What matters is our action, not our feeling. Accordingly, the CCC teaches that same-sex acts are “intrinsically disordered” because they are contrary to our nature as given by God. We cannot choose a different nature; we are called to work within what God has bestowed, guided by natural law.
It must be remembered, however, that none of us possesses perfect desires, and none of us acts flawlessly on the desires we have. As Christ says, “Let the one among you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone… (Jn 8:7).” Christ came to save sinners, calling all of us to Christian perfection. That call is universal: everyone, including those with same-sex attraction, is invited to unite their suffering, disordered desires, and missteps with Christ’s sacrifice on the cross. Speaking moral truth about acts does not preclude love. Christ himself loved sinners fiercely while correcting them. Just as a child needs both discipline and affection, every human being needs both correction and love.
What matters morally, then, is how we integrate our desires into a life oriented toward virtue, self-mastery, and love of God and neighbor. By cultivating chastity, self-discipline, and the virtues, individuals with same-sex attraction can live in accordance with the moral law without denying their experiences.
Finally and most importantly, this approach reminds us that Christian life is not about perfection in isolation but about participation in the life of Christ. All of us, regardless of our specific struggles, are called to grow in holiness through prayer, sacraments, and the support of community. The moral guidance of the Church provides a structure for this growth, but it is always accompanied by God’s mercy and love, which never fail. Recognizing this balance — truth and love, guidance and freedom — allows us to engage with the reality of human desire with clarity, compassion, and hope.
Ben McCullough received a bachelor’s degree in liberal arts from Wyoming Catholic College and a master’s degree in sacred theology from the International Theological Institute in Austria. His career has taken him around the world. He currently works in Catholic health care in mission and ethics roles.